My own death experience

Aho

This is really personal so please respect this but, I was recently asked by one of my clients  who is in the last stages of Lou Gehrig's disease and can no longer control any part of his body except his eyes and his mind, if I could tell him about my own death experience.

 I wanted to share this with you too.

 I was rushed to  the hospital late on a Sunday night in a little tiny rural community hospital that had no surgeons in the hospital at the time with a ruptured fallopian tube from an ectopic pregnancy. I did not even know I was pregnant. But sometimes the embryo gets caught in the fallopian tube and continues to develop there and grows too big there and makes the fallopian tube full of rich nutrients and blood supply burst, causing internal bleeding and death without immediate surgery.

I went to visit some friends in the country that day and was having a great time when I suddenly started to feel very sick. I asked if I could lie down somewhere and they took me to a bedroom with an adjoining bathroom. I laid down but the room began to spin and I felt queasy and began throwing up and a headache and diarrhea and just everything  was blowing out of me everywhere and I was passing out on the bathroom floor and I could barely get the attention of my friends in the other room before I passed out completely. This all happened in just two hours. They put me in their car and drove me to the hospital which was a bad choice as the EMTs could have done more for me and probably would have saved my life. I learned to always call an ambulance and never try to take someone to the hospital yourself . By the time they got me to the hospital the emergency doctors were trying to rouse me and they have put the pants of life on me, which are compression sleeves on your legs and lower torso  to cut of the flow of blood to the lower body because you are bleeding out, trying to keep what blood you have left in the upper body to the brain and heart. They were able to wake me up long enough for me to see I was in a hospital. I could feel them hovering around me and then I noticed I was looking down at myself lying on a gurney with 5 people hovering around that body there. I felt perfectly OK! IN fact I was not panicked or in pain or in any way upset at all. It felt good to be released from that body and so I was just watching what was going on as if I was astral travelling.

Then I started to see my whole life playing out, close to my eyes as if a holographic movie was playing. Not inside me but not far outside me either. And it was moving very fast through every incident of my life from the present moment backwards through every event and situation I had ever experienced. But instead of just being memories, I was revisiting actual sections of my past and hearing what people were thinking and seeing what other people were doing and saying who where not even present in that situation. So it was like a bunch of holograms piled on top of each other showing me not only my experience in that situation but my mother’s experience and thoughts and my fathers experience and thoughts and even strangers who were influenced by that experience and their actions words and thoughts. It was very detailed and very in depth. And so as I watched the past event where I wanted to take my 3 year old on a camping trip to Colorado, I saw my mother getting all upset as she did. But I also could hear her thinking that I was moving to Colorado and she didn’t’ want me to take her grandchild away. AT the time, she tried to get custody of my child because she really believed I was moving to Colorado. Of course she did not get custody but I did not know that that time that she felt I was moving away. I did not realize what had made her so upset until this  moment as I watched this event play out.  In fact, in all the events that I saw play out in this holographic experience I could see how my actions effected other people. I could see how my words choices and actions effected other people in good ways or on bad ways. I could see  where I had hurt my dad by disconnecting with him when I was 21. I could see where my ex husband really did hate my guts and wanted me dead. I could see the why of everything that happened. And when I saw how I had hurt my dad I just wanted to reach out to him in this moment ask his forgiveness. And when I saw how much my ex husband hated me and wanted to kill me I could in this moment completely forgive myself for divorcing him. Suddenly everything made sense. And I was able to forgive those people who had hurt me in my life because I could see now the reason why they did what they did to me. I could see how my sister was an emotional wreck at the time I asked her to give me a place to stay and she refused. Everything just made perfect sense! It was a relief to finally understand why my mother shunned me for getting that divorce. And I forgave her for making my life so incredibly hard at that time and not supporting me. And I also asked for forgiveness from everyone who I had harmed  in my life as I saw that in these holograms being played out. . So this whole review of all the events in my life became a simple natural opportunity to ask for and receive forgiveness. To forgive those who had harmed me as I was there seeing all the reasons why things had occurred the way they did. It was very cathartic! And beautiful too!

And then I saw that white Light that everybody talks about that leads us to the next state of being in our eternal adventure. And I could feel my grandparents there welcoming me ready to hug me and so many others who I have known in this lifetime seemed to be just hidden in that brilliant white Light and I wanted to go there very much. There was nothing to prevent me from going there and I was just about to go there when I found myself lying in a bed in a room in a hospital. Not the hospital my physical body was in but some other room that seemed like a hospital to me. And here sitting in a chair by my bed was Jesus. And in the other chair was Mary. Remember I was raised Catholic so this makes sense. I think if I were Buddhist I would have seen Buddha sitting in that chair.
And I was happy to see Jesus and Mary and they smiled at me and Jesus took my hand and it felt so wonderful and beautiful and I was so happy.
And Jesus asked me if I was ready to come home. And the first thing without hesitation was YES!

But then I remembered my daughter. She was only 3 years old at the time. And I began to think about who is going to raise her? My parents were too old. Her father was a creep, there was no one to raise her up. And I had made a solemn vow to God that if he would give me a child I would do my best to raise her up to be a beautiful daughter of God. And so I looked at  Jesus sitting there and said, you know, you gave me the gift of my daughter and I made a promise to you to raise her to adulthood. I think I would like to keep my promise to you and to her. And Jesus looked at me and his face saddened and he had sorrow in his eyes and he Said. “ Its not going to be easy, you know.” And I said , I know. And Mary smiled a smile of encouragement at me and Jesus touched my third eye and suddenly I was in horrendous pain!- the worst pain of my life as waves of electric shock coursed through my body. And I came to as they were applying the paddles of life to shock my heart back into beating again.
They saw I was alive once more, I had regained consciousness, and they began to quickly wheel me into surgery.

Later I learned that I was in the ER being worked on for 49 minutes which was how long it took the surgeon to make it to the hospital from his home and I was dead for 4 minutes and they had to give me 8 quarts of blood which is an entire full body transfusion. Yes it did change my life from that point.

Well I have raised my daughter into a wonderful woman who now is married and has one daughter of her own and is expecting her second daughter in October. She is beautiful and smart and everything that I would have wished for.

I feel I have accomplished my mission in this world and I am looking forward to going into that Light that is so beautiful and made me so so happy when I first saw it 3 decades ago.
IN the meantime I try to be an example of someone who understands the purpose of the universe and lives within the guiding principles that Creator used to create this physical place and I spend my days gaining new perceptions of Creator.
There is nothing unpleasant or untoward or difficult about crossing over into our true intrinsic state of being One in Creator.. We do not lose our personalities at all.

 I feel that it is simply transitioning from one state of being into a another state of being.

 I was not less than I am now. I was simply  with body or without body. And in my case when I was released from that body that was suffering, it was a pleasant experience indeed!

WE go on forever! WE are eternal spiritual beings. We were given this body to use as a vehicle to get to know Creator more intimately. We were given this body with inner and outer senses to perceive Creator in every tree , every blade of grass, everything that Creator created with His own Essence is here in this world for us to perceive Creator in! that is it! There is no other purpose other than to get to know God! When we leave here we leave behind these physical senses so we can no longer perceive God in this world in this way. That is why the body is such a valuable and precious tool. But it is only a tool for this life experience and it is not needed for the rest of our eternal lives. We continue to perceive Creator but not in this physical way in this physical world.

You will never lose your memories or your connections with the people you love. You will never lose anything but your physical body and the ability to perceive with physical senses in this physical world. But this physical world is just a tiny speck in the universe of God. There is so much more to do when  you leave this body. Its an eternal adventure of Love and Light and Peace and JOY!

I hope what I experienced helps you to understand that you are not judged, you are not condemned no matter what your life adventure was like for you. There are no pearly gates, no judgments whatsoever involved. You are already the son of God! You don’t have to qualify for what is already your birthright! Learn to recognize yourself as the son of God and all is well.


My teaching here for you:

"When you wake up every morning, are you aware straightaway how privileged you are? You have arms, legs, hands, a mouth, ears, eyes… Suppose you woke up one morning to find you could no longer see or hear or move a limb… That can happen – or you might not wake up at all!… But every morning you wake up with all your faculties, and you are not even aware of it; you are not grateful. Treasures and extraordinary possibilities are yours, but because you are short of money or have not had the success you had hoped for, you are forever complaining, rebelling and making yourself unhappy. If you think about it a little, you will realize the extent of your ingratitude and lack of intelligence.
Learn to give thanks every day. The moment you wake up in the morning and realize that you are there in one piece, with all your faculties, ready to begin a new day, give thanks and you will feel happy. "

Feel free to contact me here www.shamanelder.com


Aho
Shaman Elder Maggie

Day 85 After Death, What Then?

In the end, and I know this from experience, you will judge yourself. You will judge whether your belief system was right or wrong. God does not judge. And in some ways that is even more scary than thinking God will judge you. You will judge yourself! At the moment of death we read from others that your life will flash in front of you. I know that it is slightly more than this. I died and left my body and went into the light and I saw my life from another state, from my  buddhic body and I saw everything I had done and everyone whom I had influenced and all the conversations both good and bad and all the experiences and how they influenced me and how I influenced others. I saw what my beliefs did to myself and to others. I instantly knew what beliefs were right and which were wrong and where I got them and who I affected with them.  I saw the reason why things happened as they did from a different perspective. I could see how my words affected the person I spoke to and what actions they took as a result of my words. For example, if you told someone they were good for nothing, you might see the outcome of that person not being able to hold down a job for the rest of their lives.

Another example is when my mother thought she needed to take my child away because I was going to Colorado for a three week vacation and she found that very irresponsible of me. When she died she saw that I truly was going on vacation and that it was good for me and my child to take that vacation and a lot of great bonding happened during that time. So she saw at the moment of her death that she had made a mistake in her actions there because of her belief system. Luckily it had no deleterious effect on anyone except for hurt feelings all around. And I had already forgiven her for that anyway.

So you see everyone you affected for good and bad. And the feeling is immediately one of asking for forgiveness from those you have harmed. We have all harmed other people in our lives. And in that single flash of an eye you may see that those people have indeed forgiven you for harming them already.

And some may have not.

( it is vitally important for us before we leave this planet to forgive everyone who may have harmed us in any manner, for their sakes, not ours. We may leave at any moment so do your forgiving now.)

I was fortunate in that all those I had harmed had already forgiven me and I was free to go on into the Unity with God. We cannot unite with God unless we have this forgiveness. It is the thing which separates us from God. God does not hold us separate. He does not judge us or cause any separation. We do. We judge ourselves and we cause our own separation from full unity in Him.

I also should tell the other side of the coin here. In this same instant you are given the opportunity to see why people did things to you that were harmful or unjust. You finally see the why in someone's actions. You can see the reality they were coming from, their own belief system. My mother was really trying to protect my daughter. In her heart she did what she thought was right and good. And how could I not forgive her instantly knowing why she did what she did. Of course! There was nothing to forgive! She was loving me and my child! I bless her for her love even if it was displayed in a less than perfect way! WE are humans!

So you see all the reasons why things happened to you. Why your Mother didn't love you enough, why you didn't get that job you wanted so much, everything. And in this instant you see and finally understand and forgive those that have hurt you in any way. "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." You suddenly know what you have done and why others did what they did.

It was a life changing experience for  me. No doubt. But it taught me that I will be the judge of myself. It is in this review of your life, what you have done and what others have done to you that you either give forgiveness and receive forgiveness from and to everyone and everything in your life or you refuse to take and give forgiveness. If you refuse to take or give forgiveness, that is your choice and if you refuse to forgive, you can hang around the Lower Worlds until you change your mind. Some souls hang around until the one they can't forgive also passes on and has this experience, sees what really occured at that time. Then and only then when the first soul is sure that the one he can't forgive sees what really happened, that he can finally forgive and they both go into unity. And if you refuse to take forgiveness you can hang around the lower worlds until you change your mind. It is not God who decides. It is your free will choice. God wants unity. God has always offered you complete Union in Him and with Him and through Him and for this I get on my knees and give thanks!

I chose to come back to this world and complete a life here. It was my choice to come back or not. I came back because my little girl was only 3 years old and I was a single Mom and as much as I wanted to go to that union in a total way I also knew that God had given me a gift here and a responsibility to this little girl who I loved so dearly and so I came back.

It is not God who will forgive you for what you believe. God is beyond forgiveness as He can see exactly why you believe what you believe and exactly why you have acted and thought and spoken as you have. He is not into judgment. He is a God of love. It is you who will judge you. It is you who will see that because of a wrong belief you forced your employees to wear red ties. It will be up to you to forgive yourself for that and to ask their forgiveness for making them do that.

In the end what I have learned most is to not judge others. When I looked on my life I saw that the most grievous errors I had made was in judging others. As I judged them, so I was judged by them. These were the hardest things to obtain forgiveness for. I created wrong beliefs for them and now they have lived with wrong beliefs because of me. The worst feeling.

So I do not judge, My God help me not to judge, because I don't want to make that most grievous error.

  If I do not judge others I also don't need to judge myself.

 Sure, I can see my errors and correct them but that is not judgment,  that is being human and taking responsibility for my life.

But if I judge, I am judged and that is the worst. So it is up to me to examine my beliefs and try to maintain good and true beliefs. This is what buddhism is all about. This is the purpose of recapitulation. We have many tools available to us to help us with our beliefs. And basically if you do no harm to yourself or others, if you are living a life free of judgment with a decent belief system that you monitor, and you are impeccable in your thoughts, words and actions, you are preparing yourself for complete union in God and you will find that union right within this living life now and here.

You do not wait till you die to achieve unity with God. It is here and now. Jesus showed us that it is possible for a human being to be in complete unity with God on this planet now. Reach out for it as it is here available to you right now. We are all human! God knows that! He isn't waiting for you to become something else! He isn't waiting. You are waiting. For what?

God is love and there is no judgment in God. There need be no judgment in you. I share this most important thing I have ever learned with you now. It may not make sense to you and I don't expect it  will but I share it with you because it is so important and I think you might begin to see what I am saying. I wish I could share this piece of pure wisdom with everyone but very few can really understand what I am saying. It seems to be something you need to experience for yourself. But by then it is over and you can't come back and try to do better. You now have a piece of my soul knowledge.

And finally, in my teaching, take what works for you and throw the rest away.

Aho!

Shaman Elder Maggie

Shaman Elder Maggie Wahls

To become a student of Traditional Shamanism with Shaman Elder Maggie just go to http://www.shamanelder.com and begin today!

To get a copy of Shaman Elder Maggie’s new book The Shaman Speaks go here http://www.shamanspeaks.com

To contact Shaman Elder Maggie, Email: shaman@shamanelder.com)

To make a donation to Shaman Elder Maggie’s work send your donation through www.paypal.com to shaman@shamanelder.com

[All work by Shaman Elder Maggie is copyright protected. If you would like to use this article, please contact  shaman@shamanelder.com for permission.]