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Sunday, January 30, 2011

Day 25:How Relationships Work According to Traditional Shamanism

Here is how it goes according to my own shamanic lineage- some good common sense for all of us. When two people merge and make a commitment it is like this. Every person has their own path to walk. Sometimes we meet people who cross our path and we enjoy their friendship for a time while our paths are close together but then we move away from each other as our paths continue on their way. This is natural, right and good! Sometimes we meet someone whose path runs parallel to ours for a while and then curves off slowly in another direction. Sometimes we meet people whose path runs parallel to ours and we can walk to gather hand in hand for decades. Sometimes one person jumps off their path and starts to walk the other person's path instead. Many women have devoted 40 years to the path of their husband and then when he passes over they write me crying that they realize they have not walked one step on their path in forty years and how can they find it now and how can they catch up to where they should be. How sad! Women give up their own paths more easily than men and that is a cultural thing as women were taught to do this.

Anybody can be guilty of seducing a person to come walk their path for them or with them. No one likes to walk their path alone.  So people are always looking for someone who is willing to abandon their own path and come walk the path of another. But it is not fulfilling for either person. The one asking for help does not get the help he or she is looking for because no one can walk your path except you. They think they will get farther ahead, that it will make the path easier and usually does physically but it actually just delays any forward progress. The user ends up sitting in a proverbial wheelchair on his path while the partner does all the pushing. They don't move forward as well as if the person would just walk on his own two feet- and the pusher is angry about pushing and the user is angry because the pusher of the wheelchair is not pushing fast enough... Well it does not work.

And to walk the path of someone else is completely ignoring your own path and you will feel that hole in your spirit no matter how you try to cover it up and say you are sacrificing your path for the sake of someone else. Doesn't work. Mother Theresa helped thousands of people exactly BY walking her own path! She did not give up anything. She did not suffer for someone else's sake! She walked her path with courage and joy!
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